Farewell to Pam

We are often witness to the bravery of individuals. I have had this distinct honour on a number of occassions. Recently this testimony has, as it were, unfolded closer to home. A dear friend, a sister in spirit has braved tremendous challenges. My spirit sister has recently had a double mastectomy. I shudder to even imagine losing what I think defines my manhood. But I slowly realise it is not the feminine form that makes them women. It is the enduring courage and compassion that differentiates them from the male species. There are countless women I could use as examples. Not women in the media, alas women I bear a close association with! For now I want to focus on my spirit sister. She beat the dreaded disease. But life would challenge her even more. She had just bid a final farewell to her sister. Seeing her the next day, I tried to imagine if I could embody such bravery, such courage in the face of such adversity. Could I embrace having to parent a niece or nephew? Would I consider it a gift, a privilege or just a responsibility. While this tragedy unfolds, her ailing mother lies in hospital. What other ingredients could possibly be added to this challenge? Lest I forget...Farewell Pam i didn't know you that well, but your sister speaks highly of you.

Squandering a gift

The choral rehearsal went well. Paulo left the cathedral. He had been pleased with his performance. He loved

it. He felt being approached by Leonardo to pose as the Messiah himself was a well-deserved honour. Who else

could befit the role. He strolled out of the cathedral. Still engrossed with the thought of the Duke of Milan's

recommendation that he would be ideal to portray the innocence of the Messiah. His journey was interrupted

by the approach of a vagrant. Paulo could not hide his disgust for this wretched creature. How dare someone

of such low standing even dare speak to him. Drunk and filthy, Claudius was desparate for his next meal. He

had not bothered to eat for days. Now, the hunger pangs was gnawing at him. He hoped that Paulo would take

pity on him. But Paulo could not have cared less. Why should he? Why should he pity someone less fortunate

than himself? Why should a drunken beggar on the via be his concern? Claudius grabbed at Paulo's robe,

tearing it. Paulo was furious and and proceeded to kick him. He was angry. The Duke of Milan had given him

that robe. How could someone live that way? Always drunk, always begging living on the streets.

I took the advice...I changed my perspective

It was going to be a different sort of weekend. It always happens that we let unpleasant issues determine everything in its entirety. So there I was at the doorstep of yet another weekend. So I'm thinking well it doesn't have to be that bad. Besides you have no control about what's bad, none whatsoever. I then proceed to think about the really good things instore for me. Friday evenings, violin instruction at the music academy. I like it, it challenges me, it has rules. You must follow them or else you will be making a lot of noise. One of my rugby coaches always said you need players who could play the piano and you need players who could move the piano. He was referring to the subtle nuances between the backline and the pack of forwards. Well, Mr Coach I play the violin and carry it where it needs to be. Well, then there is my pride and joy, Zara and Thaqeeb, I get to share in their joy. They're real fun, except when they are hungry or sleepy. I cannot imagine life without them. Who would miss me when I'm gone? Who would remember me kindly only? Oh yes, I was writing about how we let the odd bad experience over-arch everything. Well, it would have to be really bad for me not to think fondly of my weekends, my weeks, my seasons, in fact my life. There are so many good things about people, even the worst of them have good qualities and they may just have lost their way. So if you really are the better person, you must draw them back onto that righteous path, not further down a slippery slope. We have all lost our way some time or the other.

The next installment of La Ultima Cena will be published sometime this week. It takes an even nastier turn, unfortunately, but then again what should be the wages for our sins?

La Ultima Cena

1498, I can barely remember the day. Its early afternoon. I had been binge drinking. It’s become a way of life. There was not much else that interested me. There was all the fuss, all of which was not very clear to me at the time. I do remember clearly the offer of a few silver coins. "That should tie me over for a few days" I thought, "most importantly, the alley ways would no longer be my shelter and the sidewalks no longer my pillow at night".

Little had I known that he, Leonardo, would become the greatest artist of his time. He ordered his assistants to help me out of the gutter. "This wretched creature would be perfect; his face would represent the most treacherous man ever" he told his helpers. Back at his studio, I was ordered to take a bath and given a change of clothing. The bath sobered me a bit. What is this? I asked. The artist responded saying "La Ultima Cena (The Last Supper)". "You should feel honoured", he continued, "The entire religious faith is based on this scene". "You will represent the most treacherous man in history". "Even his name, Judas, meaning "Praised One" bears testimony to the man he was meant be".

Later that evening the artist completed his work. My senses were intact. I became more aware of my surroundings. I recognized the giant easel, I had seen it before. "I was here before master; you summoned me three years ago". The artist came closer and gasped in amazement, "You were my model for Jesus three years ago, and you were a member of the cathedral’s choir. But your face, the innocence, from it I was able to capture salvation itself".

"How is it possible?". "How could that which epitomises goodness itself, digress to represent evil?".

Dear LORD, I have almost faltered...again

I wrote recently of my impending career "change". Well, it has just dawned on me that I cannot, under the current circumstances make that move...at least, not just yet. But in life as in love, I was, as many of you, just chomping at the bit, to move onto something new. If matters persist, then I would be leaving with a lot of baggage and many disgruntled colleagues. The one thing you do not want to take into a new job is baggage. For one, it closes the door behind you. Even if you have no intention of returning, you would not want to leave under those circumstances. I often quip those famous words, "I'LL BE BACK". But that is all it will be, if I leave with matters unattended. So my new adventure would be delayed somewhat, so that I could be fair and live up to my end of the "deal". The new adventure is yours and if you want to enjoy it completely, you would want the well wishes of those you have for so long had part of your life. Those who will be part of your new adventure would have to be fair and allow you to do justice to the life you once depended on. You have been down that road before, you know where it leads, so tread cautiously and GODSPEED

Life is like an oil painting

Is it not amazing how you can see the absolute beauty in something whereas someone else cannot. I have just been blessed with the opportunity to bear witness again to HIS amazing greatness. I was standing at the HEADS in Knysna and taking in the beautiful vista. Next to me stood an elderly gentleman and his female companion. He kept telling her that he really could not see what the fuss is all about and they should rather just continue their journey. She protested saying she wants to enjoy the view. Therein lies the rub - we experience the same thing differently with some of us able to see the beauty of it and others not. We also experience people in the same way - some of us are able to see the beauty and value whereas others not. Even worse when we, for some reason, tend to ignore, or overlook, or deny the value of someone and set forth to influence others to feel the same way we do. Travesty, you say - I agree. So take in that oil painting - someone has taken the time and effort to share with you his talent. Take in that vista, the POTTER has moulded it for you to enjoy and better still, to be aware of what HE is capable of. God Bless and take care

Monday - the day I live for

Friday I wrote that I get to be an academic. Well I have been one for 3 and a half years. But I was more of a "pseudo-academic" since it was not my main focus. I enjoyed it so much that I decided that IT must be my calling - to guide the learning of others, to influence the thoughts of others. Was a disastrous weekend of sorts. But being weekend and the time we start to think of our Creator - Friday for some, for others Saturday and Sundays, I was reminded of a question I was once asked and the following answer was appropriate and I wish to share it with you:

GOD IS IN THE SLUMS, IN THE CARDBOARD BOXES WHERE THE POOR PLAY HOUSE. GOD IS IN THE SILENCE OF A MOTHER WHO HAS INFECTED HER CHILD WITH A VIRUS THAT WILL END BOTH THEIR LIVES. GOD IS IN THE CRIES HEARD UNDER THE RUBBLE OF WAR. GOD IS IN THE DEBRIS OF WASTED OPPORTUNITY AND LIVES, AND GOD IS WITH US IF WE ARE WITH THEM. “IF YOU REMOVE THE YOKE FROM YOUR MIDST, THE POINTING OF THE FINGER AND SPEAKING WICKEDNESS, AND IF YOU GIVE YOURSELF TO THE HUNGRY AND SATISFY THE DESIRE OF THE AFFLICTED, THEN YOUR LIGHT WILL RISE IN DARKNESS, AND YOUR GLOOM WILL BECOME LIKE MIDDAY AND THE LORD WILL CONTINUALLY GUIDE YOU AND SATISFY YOUR DESIRE IN SCORCHED PLACES” (ISAIAH 58: 9-11)

Another Friday

Friday, 6 July 2007, 2.30 pm. Not overly excited about Fridays, especially since we're never more than 6 days away from the weekend. The good thing is, I am getting closer to my move to the Faculty of Informatics and Design on 1 August 2007, so yippeee! I do, however have the unenviable weekend task of having to grade almost 150 exam scripts and don't mention the assignments.

I am excited about my move, though. I get to fulfill my dream of being an academic, so all praise to my Creator for bestowing such a blessing upon me, one of so many which I feel is undeserved, but I will appreciate, cherish and do all that would make my Father proud of me. I do, however have to now trek at least 20 k's to the centre of Cape Town.

I have also started, in earnest to fulfill the role of Project Manager for the Student Administration System. Its in the planning stage, but that's where all the work happens and ultimately where success is determined. Father guide me, please and grant me the wisdom to lead those who are in need of leadership.

Come on, Monday